Tag: Advertising

Am I just getting older or are Super Bowl ads more offensive every year? I mean, we don't set the bar very high for beer and car commercials and yet somehow the ads have an increasingly difficult time clearing it. Last year's theme was that dark people talk funny; this year, it is that women are bitches.

Don't get me wrong, every commercial aimed at men is at least vaguely misogynist. Empty-headed bimbos eager to rip off their clothes are like set pieces in the average ad intended to be aired during a football game. But somehow that baseline level of bad didn't seem sufficiently attention-getting to the 2010 TV audience. If you watched the game you already know the ad I am about to show you. Like the "Sales Genie" ads from two years ago, this commercial left not a single viewer unclear about the fact that he or she had just seen something that turned the offensive up to 11:

For the first 20 seconds it's actually a decent ad. Creepy, no doubt, but it does what ads are supposed to do. It draws in the viewer's attention and has the "What the hell is this?" factor. Advertisers like that. And for the first 20 seconds it's standard "Man beaten down by traffic jams, alarm clocks, and his inane job needs Product X to make him feel alive again" fare. It's probably more unsettling than a good ad should be. It doesn't help that Michael Hall (of Dexter) is doing the voiceover while angry looking men glare into the camera, but up to this point it's pleasantly forgettable.

Then it takes a sharp right turn onto What the Fuck Avenue. The middle third is devoted to the real root of Man's dilemma – shrill, bitchy women.

"I will listen to your opinions of my friends. I will listen to your friends opinions of my friends. I will be civil to your mother."

"I will put the seat down. I will carry your lip balm. I will watch your vampire TV shows with you."

"I will take my socks off before getting into bed. I will put my underwear in the basket."

"And because I do all of this…I will drive the car I want to drive."

Cue the vroom-vroom footage of the Dodge Charger promising to compensate for your tiny genitals and your nagging stupid ball-and-chain. Ads like these never fail to amaze me. Dozens and dozens of people saw this at various stages from conception to the airwaves and nobody said "Are you kidding"? I realize there are no women in the upper management at Chrysler and the ad agency is probably 99% white male as well but the odds of not one person having enough common sense to nix this seem low. Given that the auto market is, you know, half female it is questionable strategy to run an ad straight out of the 1950s that basically says, "You put up with all of that bitch's crap; now it's time to lay down the law."

Way to go, Chrysler. It took something special to top this Bridgestone ad…and you delivered.

If you watch any nonzero amount of television you may have noticed an interesting trend in advertising since the beginning of the year. Your friends in corporate America have helpfully adjusted their tactics in response to the way the Invisible Hand adjusted your standard of living. If there remains anyone who doubts that the country has fallen on bleak economic times, watching an hour or two of TV will make that fact perfectly clear. Retailers have adapted to the current climate using one of two broad strategies.

First, there is the prominent "We're you're pals! We'll help you save money!" technique. They know you're broke but luckily for you they have products for broke people too. Hormel has doubled its ad budget for Spam and, for the first time ever, rolled out a national ad campaign for its dirt cheap, mucilege-like Dinty Moore beef stew. The soothing voice of Dennis Haysbert tells us tales of the Great Depression and reminds us of the simple things that make us happy – home cooked meals, etc. – while reminding us of the quality and value of Allstate. DirecTV pitches pay-per-view to its customers by helpfully noting "Did you know that when five people go to the movies you pay for the same movie five times? Why not pay once and stay in!"

Unilever has rolled out a national campaign for Suave, the shampoo equivalent of Top Ramen. The home remodeling industry, which for years has beaten consumers over the head with pitches about $20,000 kitchen remodelings, room additions, and luxury items, is now advertising hammers and wire to people who need to fix things themselves (Home Depot's new campaign: "More Saving, More Doing" over images of people fixing cracked windows). McDonald's loudly points out that its new Starbucks knockoff coffees cost half as much as the real thing. Microsoft's new ads say little about the commercial failure of Vista and a lot about the fact that comparable Apple products cost thrice as much as Windows-based PCs. Everywhere we look we're suddenly being sold the simple life. Take note during the next commercial break of how many ads are selling value, durability, and frugality.

The second strategy is the blatant but undignified "Please, please, please start spending again" ads for products which can't pitch a cheap alternative. Gillette Fusion ads now remind men that "when the Indicator Strip turns blue, change your blade for a better shave!

" as Americans decide to wring twice as many shaves out of the obscenely expensive replacement blades. Nestle PureLife is pitching huge prizes and impressing the virtues of bottled water to a nation that suddenly remembered that it can drink from the tap for free. Starbucks, purveyors of the archetypical "I don't fuckin' need this" purchase for many Americans, is rolling out Value Meal-type offerings.

Las Vegas, which exists solely for the purpose of getting fat midwesterners (and weekending mortgage brokers and talent execs from LA) to pour money into slot machines or blow it on shitty, overpriced shows, is dying the slow death of the overextended debtor.

And the auto industry? Good God, the auto industry. Dodge dealers have been heard to offer buy one get one free Rams and Avengers (think about that for a second). GM has once again resorted to 0% financing and piles of cash-back on the hood in an effort to move cars. Hyundai tells customers that they can return their car if they get fired or laid off – and unbelievably Saturn one-ups them by promising that you can stop making payments and keep the car. Desperation is thus re-defined. Even Toyota, the 900 pound gorilla of the auto industry, is telling customers "you'll never have as much buying power as you do right now!" In other words, thousands of cars sitting on lots and nobody looking to buy. And every ad, regardless of manufacturer, repetitively pushes fuel economy, resale value, financing, and discounts, discounts, discounts.
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After decades of using advertising to whip up demand for expensive shit that no one really needs, corporate America has set its sights much lower these days.
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They know you're not going to remodel the kitchen or buy a Lexus; they'll settle for getting you to buy anything. Time will tell if even this lowered bar is too high given the current state of affairs.