SETTING THE BAR

The muckrakers over at Pravda USA have provided yet another example of their unique brand of hard-hitting journalism, running a non-sequitur "story" entitled "List of Thwarted Terror Attacks Since Sept. 11" apropos of absolutely nothing. Even for the average FoxNews.com copy writer this must have required several bouts of pride-swallowing. Such a difficult job – they must continually propagandize about how much safer we are thanks to Our Leader (and waterboarding!) while simultaneously reminding us that we are in great danger. But let's leave that little inconsistency alone for the moment.
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Note the introductory copy: "The following is a list of known terror plots thwarted by the U.S. government since Sept. 11, 2001."

And then the first entry is Richard 'Shoe Bomber' Reid. Um, if my memory serves, Reid was "thwarted" by two things: the fact that he's apparently unable to operate matches and a doctor/passenger who sedated him. By what stretch of the imagination and poetic license did "the U.S. government" thwart that attempt? Why let reality interrupt a propaganda narrative, I suppose.

This list appears to consist of either unsubstantiated charges (note Jose Padilla, who is "accused of seeking a dirty bomb", a charge so baseless that it was not mentioned once in the criminal trial or conspiracy charges of which he was convicted) or the sorriest excuses for "terrorism plots" that we could imagine. It's sad and pitiable how desperate the right is to wave around some War on Terror / Patriot Act / Wiretapping / Waterboarding success story. It has them digging up every nutcase who ever dreamed of committing an act of terrorism and hoping that we won't object to how low they set the bar for defining a realistic or credible threat.

Let's see, there's Dhiren Barot, who "plotted" to bomb financial centers. He was arrested with no funding, no promise of funding, no vehicles related to an attack, no bombs, and no bomb-making materials. Who could forget Iyman Faris, the Brooklyn Bridge terrorist:

Faris' investigations into obtaining the necessary tools for the dual-operation involved asking a friend where he might purchase welding equipment, and researching the structure of the bridge on the internet. He concluded that the operation was unlikely, and sent a message back to Pakistan calling off the plot.

Looks like he "thwarted" himself! But not before he engaged in detailed planning like typing "Brooklyn Bridge" into Google and asking a friend where he might purchase a blowtorch. America may never know how close it came to tragedy. The list goes on to dredge up FBI "successes" like the so-called Sears Tower Plot and Fort Dix Plot. Nevermind that those two groups of beyond-amateurish retards couldn't have successfully planned and executed a fucking 7-11 robbery. They talked about blowing up the Sears Tower, ergo the threat was REAL! If you had a spare two hours to research each of the items on the list, you would come away with a very different perspective on the nature and extent of the threats these incidents actually posed. But Fox News knows that you won't.

The right-wing media's zealous efforts to convince you that you are in imminent danger have officially jumped the shark. Their narrative would have you believing that America was on the cusp of tragedy in these instances, saved only by George Bush, Waterboarding, Domestic Spying, School Vouchers, and No Child Left Behind. Personally, I don't think "fear" describes how I feel when I read about a guy who did some Google/Wikipedia reading and became convinced that he could not in fact destroy the Brooklyn Bridge with a blowtorch. "Amused" might be a better term.
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OBERWEIS UBER ALLES

Much has been made in the national media of the fact that former Speaker Dennis Hastert's seat was won by a Democrat in a special election.

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That has shock value as a headline – "Democrat wins GOP Speaker's Seat" – especially if one knows Chicagoland and realizes that the district is in DuPage County (high-income, ultra-conservative festung suburbia). What the media crucially neglect to mention, however, is that Johnny Democrat was running against Jim Oberweis, who is categorically out of his fucking mind. He is also the Los Angeles Clippers of Illinois politics, losing Senate races in 2002 and 2004, a race for Governor in 2006, and now this.

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He is the ultimate Find a Warm Body Who Will Waste a Few Million of His Own Money on This Race guy.
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If anything, I think the results of the special election are depressing – this bag of fluid, whose policy positions consist mostly of ranting against immigration, got 45% of the vote.

PUNT

Thanks to a full Sunday of internet connection problems and a bunch of actual work to do today (sometimes I forget I have a real job) I have to punt Monday's entry.

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I'll make it up later today or, failing that, the rest of the week.

Promise.

Actually, here. Let my comment on Non-Seq this morning serve as a post for the day. It's as concise as anything I'm capable of writing, which is to say it is only three paragraphs.

NPF: THE WILD FRONTIER

Long-time readers know that I love eBay. On Tuesday, I finally reached a milestone that lets me know that I love it a little too much: the 1000-feedback pedestal. This should not pass without comment.
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There are no physical frontiers left in this country. There is no Wild West to settle, no exploration of rivers or continents that may or may not exist. We can go to Google Earth and get a 0.5-meter resolution picture of nearly every square inch of the globe. This is part of the reason why the internet is so phenomenally popular with younger people – whereas the age of exploration provided a ready outlet for the outcasts, the quasi-criminal, the incurably curious, and the foolhardy, the collapsing of physical space over the past century has eliminated the physical frontier. So we jump into the electronic one with both feet.

I estimate that I was one of the first 0.01% of users on eBay. I remember the incredible shadiness of the early days, and I can only compare it to what the general attitude toward laws must have been like in 1880 Dodge City. All those eBay rules you see? They exist because someone tried to do everything they now forbid.
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Want to know why eBay has a No Organ Sales policy? Because I remember the guy who tried to auction a kidney circa 1998.

That 1000 feedback mostly represents Ed allowing the libidinous, slightly criminal aspects of his mind out of the cage in the noble cause of supplementing his meager student income.

I have illegally sold many copies of copyrighted works. I have printed and sold t-shirts to hippies. I sold "information" (seriously) about how to rack up thousands of frequent flyer miles at almost no cost – and I made WalMart change one of its corporate policies in the process. I bought hundreds of rare coins for peanuts at an estate sale and sold them. I sold items I didn't even have thanks to an arrangement with a wholesaler. Strangely, I feel fine about all of it. I was always honest (99.6% feedback, the red badge of being a dork) even while engaged in fundamentally shady enterprise.

I've concluded, regardless of whether or not I spend some time in purgatory for laws I may have skirted, that the world needs a giant legal gray area accessible to all. A place where people are trying to hustle and rip you off.

A place with numerous rules but a ridiculously casual attitude toward enforcement. A place that doesn't coddle the foolish (who, in this instance, are ironically almost always the wealthy). That brand-new 80gb iPod on sale for $49.99 from SUPER BUY #1 ELECTRONICS located in Beijing? If you can't spot the scam, consider the $50 you lose to be a tax on your incomprehensible stupidity.

Thanks, eBay. The more legitimate and mainstream it gets, the less fun there is to be had. My next thousand won't be nearly as awesome as the first. But good lord, I will always remember and love the days of fully-automatic firearms, organs, and, pre-PayPal, the lingering assumption that the money you dropped in the mail would disappear into the hands of a scam artist, never to be heard from again.

RUSSIAN ARK

(Editor's note: Today's entry is by…..a guest blogger! It is breaking new ground for ginandtacos. Three things struck me. First, it would be relevant and interesting to say something about the recent Russian election. Second, I know dick about Russia. Third, I know people who know a lot about Russia. So with little further ado, enjoy what my colleague (and regular commenter) Brandon Wilkening has to say about it. Incidentally, I'm more than willing to let regulars do guest posts! If there's a topic you feel particularly keen to write about, feel free to let me know via email.)

The Democratic presidential candidates earned some mild criticism in their final debate last week when they were unable to identify the future Russian president by name. When Tim Russert asked the candidates what they could say about him, Barrack Obama looked somewhat nervously at Hillary Clinton, who proceeded to butcher his name, before giving up and exclaiming “Whatever!” I just want to make a couple of points about this. First, the moderate rebuke that they did receive in the blogosphere (particularly among Russia watchers) was entirely justified, as I consider the failure to be able to name the soon-to-be president of the world’s largest country right up there with some of Bush’s early foreign policy misstatements (not to imply that either candidate is at Bush's level of ignorance). Second, Hillary’s exasperated “Whatever!” was particularly cringe worthy and reminded me of Sean Hannity’s ignorant dismissal of Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad’s name.

That said, perhaps the most disappointing thing for me about that short debate was lack of any substance in what they had to say about the presumptive victor. Hillary largely dismissed the man, Dmitry Medvedev, as Putin’s handpicked successor and essentially a stooge, and Obama largely echoed her points. Okay, yes, he is Putin’s handpicked successor in the sense that whomever Putin endorsed to be his successor was almost guaranteed to be able to ride Putin’s popularity to an easy victory. And I understand the almost reflexive need for American politicians to criticize Russia’s backsliding on democracy, a criticism with which I largely agree. Nevertheless, Putin’s exit from the presidency and the ascendance of Medvedev, who easily won this past Sunday with nearly 70% of the vote, both offer an opportunity for the next U.S President to forge closer and more constructive ties with Russia. While Medvedev can hardly be described as an eager puppet for American interests, he sounds like somebody with whom the U.S. and its Western allies can work, making it all the more disappointing that Clinton and Obama were so casually dismissive of the man.

First, a multitude of x-factors seriously complicate the exercise of trying to predict Russia’s political future. The first concerns Putin's future role. What is known is that he will become Prime Minister, which has led to speculation that Putin will enhance the power of that position and thereby retain his dominant role in Russian politics. Under Russia’s strong presidential system, the PM position has long been a thankless administrative job. If Putin were to remake the position into a serious locus of power, it would represent a transformative change. Frankly, a more serious counterweight to the president (especially since the Russian Duma has largely been transformed into a rubber stamp parliament) might not be a bad thing for Russia. The worry, of course, is that the newly empowered PM would be Putin, who has increasingly played an assertive geopolitical role, often times challenging American and Western interests. There is also speculation that PM Putin and President Medvedev would split responsibilities, with the former concentrating on domestic tasks and the latter on foreign policy, or possibly vice versa.

The other big x-factor concerns Medvedev himself. Assuming that he does inherit the vast powers of the Russian presidency and is able to make his mark on Russia’s political future, what will be his governing style? Here I believe there is some room for optimism. The first thing to note is that Medvedev and Putin come from utterly different social milieus. While the latter rose through the ranks of the KGB, Medvedev is an academic. His primary responsibilities as one of Putin’s top deputies has been the implementation of a number of national projects, including education, agriculture, health, and housing. He appears to favor a less ideological, more technocratic governing style. In recent speeches, he has publicly repudiated the official state ideology of “sovereign democracy” by arguing that Russian democracy should not be preceded by adjectives. His campaign speeches (uncontested, since the Russian campaign did not feature debates with the largely marginalized opposition) lacked the nationalist and anti-Western rhetoric recently ascendant in Russian political discourse, instead largely focusing on the solution of economic problems. Finally, his rather amiable public persona presents a sharp contrast to Putin’s often icy style.

Of course, all of this will be irrelevant if he turns out to be a mere figurehead assigned to do Putin’s bidding. But let's not jump to that conclusion. First, Medvedev didn't reach this position by accident. His name has long been mentioned as a possible successor, but for several months prior to the official announcement many assumed that Putin would name Sergei Ivanov, Russia’s former Defense Minister. Given his military background and nationalist credentials, Ivanov would have been the obvious choice to continue a legacy of state centralism, nationalist rhetoric, and anti-Western foreign policy. That Putin did not choose Ivanov or one of his other cronies from the intelligence services, but rather a brainy technocrat suspected of having reformist sympathies is intriguing to me. Your inner cynic argues that Putin knew he would be able to control Medvedev more easily. I this argument unconvincing. If Putin was looking for a stooge, there is certainly no shortage of them in contemporary Russia. Instead, he chose Medvedev, somebody with a prominent public role and nationwide name recognition.

My analysis is rosier than most, and I don’t mean to gloss over the real challenges both in U.S.-Russian relations and the state of Russia’s domestic politics. The election campaign was definitely a farce. Opposition candidates faced indifference from the national media, new electoral laws present nearly insurmountable hurdles, and an electoral commission used technicalities to bar many candidates from running. In addition, I don’t expect U.S.-Russian relations to improve overnight, as the two countries will continue to clash over Kosovo, missile defense, and American involvement in Russia’s backyard – especially post-Soviet countries such as Ukraine and Georgia. In addition, a McCain presidency would be particularly disastrous for U.S.-Russian relations, as McCain, rightly or wrongly, has been a harsh critic of Putin and is largely reviled in the Russian political establishment. Nevertheless, I feel somewhat vindicated in my optimism after attending a talk at Indiana University on Tuesday by Oleg Kalugin. Kalugin, a former KGB general and later reformist, has essentially been in political exile in the United States since publicly criticizing Putin. If anybody has reason to be pessimistic about Russia’s future, it would be him. On the contrary, he sounded optimistic that Medvedev would reduce the role of the security and intelligence services in Russia and represent a decisive break with Putin’s style of governance. I don’t expect that break to be quick or clean, but I firmly believe that this opening provides an opportunity that the next American president would be foolish to pass up.

AND THE POPE WEARS A FUNNY HAT

The sky is blue. Water is wet. Fast food is bad for you. And Americans, especially younger ones, are dumber than a goddamn bag of hammers. These are all things we know. Every few months the media trot out a remarkably similar story: organization conducts poll of basic political, historical, or general-knowledge information.
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Respondents do terribly. Media wrings hands. Fingers are pointed. Blame is assigned and rebutted. No consensus is reached. Story fades away.

People are "stunningly ignorant," as this new entry on Slate claims, and they appear to be getting dumber. This linked article tells me nothing I haven't heard before and nothing that isn't confirmed on a daily basis in my work.
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The author seems remarkably eager, though, to assign blame to No Child Left Behind. There are some basic logical problems with that premise.

First of all, has performance in these areas suffered since NCLB was passed? If I recall correctly, people were this stupid 10 years ago too. Absent some supporting evidence that performance has actually declined, these facts are irrelevant to her conclusion. Second, her supposition that NCLB is to blame (for the decline she doesn't show) is a pure leap of faith. Correlation = causation at its finest.
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People are dumb and NCLB exists. Ergo NCLB makes people dumb.

Education is the sole policy area in which I qualify as a legitimate conservative. I know that teachers don't like NCLB, and I'm not qualified to comment on whether it is a good policy.
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What I do know is that the basic premise of the law is appropriate. Yes, NCLB focuses on math and language skills at the expense of arts, humanities, and social science. But I submit that knowledge of the arts, humanities, and social science is useless in the hands of people who can't write a paragraph in grammatically correct English to save their souls, understand how interest rates work, or make a simple written argument with supporting facts.

Every day I deal with undergraduates who simply can't write. At all. They can't write, they can't express themselves in anything other than text-message slang and sentence fragments, and they find utterly foreign the idea of having to prove what they assert to be true. Let's say NCLB disappears and an emphasis returns to humanities and social science. Great. So we'll have generations of high school graduates who can find El Salvador on a globe….and can't fucking write. What does that accomplish?

Factoids, history, and social science can be taught to a reasonably smart 19 year old. Teaching an adult how to write is a lot more difficult. Call it narrow-minded, shortsighted, or just plain wrong, but if we aren't effectively drilling the basics into our high schoolers then any other facts they manage to learn are just lipstick on a pig.

WHAT'S PITIFUL IS THAT THIS IS PITIFUL

John McCain has been the butt of some humor lately on account of his comparatively spartan fund-raising in February. In that month the Clinton campaign raised about $35 million, Obama raised an undisclosed amount "significantly more" than that, and McCain pulled up the ass-end of the parade with $12 million. Bad news for McCain, you say, showing a stunning mastery of the obvious. It certainly isn't good news (although it's less daunting than it appears.*) I'm more amazed at how completely we have managed to ignore the fact that raising $12 million in 29 days is now considered laughable.

I am very repetitive in my criticism of the exponentially rising cost of our elections. It's just absurd, and I don't think most Americans realize just how absurd it is.

  • In 1996, the Dole-Kemp campaign raised a total of million in the general election period, beating the Clinton-Gore team by million.
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    Twelve years later, two Democratic candidates raised comparable or greater amounts in a single month of the primary season.

  • In 2000, George W. Bush dropped jaws by showing up to the primaries with $47 million on hand. Clinton and Obama both had million on hand by 1/1/08, and several other candidates (Romney, Edwards, Giuliani, McCain) have neared or surpassed million by now.
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  • In 1992, Clinton and Bush spent a combined $123 million in the general election period – or about 75% of what Barack Obama has raised before the primaries are even finished. And Hillary is not far behind him.

    If the increase in campaign costs was linear, each presidential election would be 10 or 20 percent more expensive than its predecessor. Instead the costs are essentially doubling every four to eight years. After Bush and Kerry combined to spend half a billion dollars in 2004 (!!!

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    ) I've been telling everyone who will listen (and students who have no choice but to listen) that this is going to be our first billion-dollars-on-the-books* election. With the three major candidates jacking up $100 million in fuckin' February, my billion-dollar estimate is probably going to be very wrong. That is pretty damn common, but I didn't think I'd miss low on this one.

    *Clinton and Obama are spending huge portions of that to battle one another, so in practice a lot of this money "cancels out" money raised by the opponent. Nonetheless, in the abstract McCain has to be terrified that the combined Democratic fund raising in one month was seven goddamn times his total. As in McCain = x, Democrats = 7x. Ouch.
    **That's actual "hard money" raised directly by the campaigns and on the books with the FEC. Counting the various soft money and "independent expenditures" by other groups, more than $2 billion was spent in 2004 and I'd expect $5 billion to be spent this year.

  • POLL SMOKIN'

    It has been a while since we spoke about the presidential election, mostly because we need the break. The key to maintaining sanity until November is to pace oneself. Nonetheless I have a pair of related questions that need answering.

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    Please note that they are not rhetorical.

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    1. With every indicator suggesting that the Democratic candidate should have a decided advantage in the general election, why does current polling show McCain ahead or in a dead heat?

    2. What exactly is McCain's appeal?

    On the first point, if you read this website regularly you are well aware of how I feel about public opinion polling in general and mass media-conducted polling in particular. At its top-dollar best it is wildly inaccurate, unstable, and susceptible to enormous variance from factors as prosaic as question order and syntax. At its worst it is flat-out misleading.
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    This general skepticism aside, I do believe that polls measure something and therefore have value. And despite the fact that Democratic primary turnout has dwarfed GOP turnout in nearly every state, often by lopsided margins, the statistically insignificant portion of the electorate that is polled seems evenly divided. I am not overly fond of the media trope about how well McCain appeals to "moderates" and "undecided" voters, as any such appeal would logically be offset by what he loses in far-right evangelical Christian support. Have McCain and his pandering sluts in the media successfully programmed Americans into thinking that he is some sort of ideological maverick / pragmatist / magical shaman? How so many Americans could claim to want the war to end while professing support for this guy is beyond me.

    Second, what is McCain's appeal? I struggle to think of a major presidential candidate who is or was a worse public speaker. He looks like he's delivering his speeches off of index cards – and at gunpoint. He talks into his chest, he appears to be dangerously close to falling asleep during his speeches, he has that Al Gore 2000-style pedantic tone of voice, and the only things he says with any conviction are that A) torture is bad and B) we need to start a few more wars in the middle east. He's not attractive, he's not young, he's not energetic, and his "message" is a pastiche of ideas taken from the past 30 years of GOP candidates. Most importantly, he's not appealing to the hardcore conservative base.

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    To whom is this bag of fluid appealing? And how?

    Mysteries, at least to me.

    NPF: EVEN FOR THE POST, THIS IS BAD

    There is absolutely no doubt about it. No competition. No debate. The New York Post is the worst newspaper in America. It's funnier than The Onion. I read it semi-regularly for kicks, but this…this one broke me. Even by Post standards, with their stated goal of maintaining a 7th-grade reading level and their editorial policy against compound sentences, this is excruciatingly bad. It crystallizes their stupidity, their no-fancy-book-learnin' populism, and their very twisted idea of "reporting."

    Don't worry, in honor of NPF this is from the sports page. At a reputable newspaper, the journalistic standards are the same for sportswriters. As the Post has none it is not an issue here. Even if you don't care about baseball you should take a look at this trainwreck. As my buddies at FJM put it, this is what we're up against. "We" of course being the literate world.

    If you can't plow through it, here's the premise. UPenn researchers/baseball nuts conducted a side project in which they created a quantitative method for measuring a player's fielding skills.
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    They determine that former Mariah Carey fucktoy/Yankees shortstop Derek Jeter is the worst fielder in baseball. They video analyzed every single ball hit into play between 2002 and 2005. Think about that. The Post is incredulous, as he has won three Gold Gloves (an absolutely meaningless sportswriter-voted popularity contest masquerading as an award). What can those eggheads at Penn be smoking?
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    (actual quote, sadly) Look at Jeter's Gold Gloves! This is roughly equivalent to arguing that Titanic is a great film because it won an Oscar or that Jethro Tull's Grammy makes them a top metal band.

    So the basic point of the article – "SCIENCE IS FOR STUPID HOMOS. TYPICAL EGGHEAD BULLSHIT BY A BUNCH OF FAGS, PROBABLY BOSTON FANS, WHO DON'T REALIZE HOW FUCKIN' AWESOME JETER IS." – is typical Post fare. Now let's move on to the journalism and see how they defend their position. Bring on the experts!

    "That's preposterous. I completely disagree. Jeter's a clutch player." said Yankees fan Mike Birch, 32.

    "It's ridiculous," said fan Jay Ricker, 22. "Jeter is all-around awesome."

    "He has intangible qualities that can't be measured with statistics," said East Village bar owner Kevin Hooshangi, 28.

    Ladies and gentlemen, these are the Post's sources. So let's summarize the debaters.

    Team Science: a group of PhDs with a large research project which included quantitative analysis of every single ball hit in play for three years (!!!)

    Team Post: Three semi-literate Yankees fans who watch about ten games per year, at which they are blind drunk, slurring, bellowing nonsense, probably shirtless, and irritating the living shit out of everyone in earshot by the bottom of the third inning.

    I know that baseball is not important.

    But let's not pretend that the rest of the Post is any different or better than this article. Just remember that this is what we're up against: facts are for stupids, science is fuckin' gay, and everything you hear that doesn't confirm your existing beliefs is biased and wrong.