Due to the fact that I am in the process of moving, I will have to keep this short and sweet. Leave it to a brilliant man like Vice President Cheney to perfectly crystallize the ideal solution to the ongoing fiasco in Iraq.
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On his "surprise visit" to Baghdad, Mr. Pay No Attention to the Man Behind the Curtain plans to give a stirring motivational speech to the Iraqi government informing them that "It's game time." Seriously.
Like a bad high school history teacher, we are now resorting to sports metaphors to address major political crises. Exactly what type of reaction does he sincerely hope to get from a speech like this? Is the entire Iraqi Council of Puppets and Men Marked for Death going to look suprised and say "Shit, it's Game Time? Well why didn't you tell us that before? Come on guys, if it's Game Time then let's get our asses in gear!
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Alright, Iraq. It's 3rd-and-goal and you're in the two minute drill. Someone needs to step up and be your nation's John Elway.
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Matthew says:
Also, somebody needs to go out there and win one for the Gipper.
Wait, I forget – was that a sports slogan or a political slogan? I know Reagan was the Gipper, but … ah, hell.
Did you hear that W is "a commander guy" now? That's pretty stirring, too.
Jake says:
Maybe he actually said "it's GAY time" and people just misheard him.
You know: 'cause Iraqis and the US military love the gays and shit.
dale says:
Dick Cheney's right. All this messing around has to stop.
Chris says:
You know what? I think "Dick" Cheney should grab a uniform and a gun, and roll into Iraq himself and fight. From what I hear, Iraq is pretty sweet if you subtract the death, suicide bombers, and whole Civil War/mass genocide thing. If you survive, then you get post traumatic stress disorder and maybe, just maybe, you get lucky enough to go back! Maybe this will work if Cheney is as good at shooting unidentified, guerilla soldiers than he is at spraying his buddies with buckshot at a retarted bird hunting farm.
History will not judge the Bush Administration well. Don't worry. I just sit back and watch things get worse daily. It sucks, but 2008 should be cakewalk for Democrats as a result. People better know what the f$@% the time is in 2008.