THINGS I CAN'T MAKE UP

On account of a comedy show on Tuesday night and the fact that The Colbert Report was all over my intended topic (and did a much better job of the funny than I would have to boot), I am taking the easy way out for the moment. Enjoy one of the rare moments in which something so idiotic and unintentionally hilarious is said on Fox News that Stephen Colbert, a man who has built an entire media career around the ability to play it straight, can't help but break character and laugh his ass off on camera.

I assume it will surprise no one to learn that the statement in question comes from Fox & Friends.

The suicide rate among the cast and crew on Fox & Friends must be astronomical.

I gave out free breast exams at Walgreen's a few times. Now I'm not allowed back.

23 thoughts on “THINGS I CAN'T MAKE UP”

  • That bit from John Kyl is even better. Obama should play that clip about how Kyl didn't intend for quantitative data like a STATISTIC to be factual statements, every time any GOP candidate, teabagger, libertarian, or other neocon opens his or her mouth.

  • The other time Colbert lost it was during a bit on the manafactured Prince Charles gay scandal. Worth looking up, but not as brilliant as the Walgreen's colonoscopy bit. That one will be legend. Too bad Kyl is retiring – the straight man gets 60%.

  • Mrs. Chili, I suspect it's the old saw about the frog and the boiling water–if you toss a frog into boiling water it will jump out, but put it in cold water on top of a burner and gradually turn up the heat and it will sit there and cook to death. I just saw a post from someone on Facebook that some 20+ states have laws on the books mandating that when a woman who is a victim of violence, whether the perp is a partner or not, the woman must be arrested too. I'll have to research it to quantify that claim but apparently state legislators have been quietly setting women up for years. I'm hoping, however, that the recent blatant attacks on women's rights will be enough to generate a backlash. We will see if membership in the women's organizations goes up.

  • The stooges at Fox were probably just thinking about blood pressure testing, which Walgreen's does perform, because when they hear about pap smears (breast exams, STD screenings, the Pill, or any of the other women's health issues that are unimportant and/or icky to them,) the words bounce right off their ears and never make it to the brain. Perhaps they hear a faint buzzing sound, but they ignore it.

    Guys, the next time you see a woman on a feminist rant and think she's going overboard, please think again. She may have just watched Fox & Friends.

  • I suspect it's the old saw about the frog and the boiling water–if you toss a frog into boiling water it will jump out, but put it in cold water on top of a burner and gradually turn up the heat and it will sit there and cook to death.

    This is not particularly relevant to anything, and I generally agree with the point that you are making, I just want to point out, because the anecdote is so widely used, that this bit about the frog and boiling water is not true.

  • The other time I saw Stephen Colbert lose it was when the chicken wing industry guy came on to talk about the shortage of chicken wings during a Super Bowl a couple or three years ago. The dude was totally in track with Stephen's routine and succeeded in knocking him off his game. Hilarious.

  • The stooges at Fox … they hear about pap smears (breast exams, STD screenings, the Pill, or any of the other women's health issues…

    But…isn't one of the Fox and Friends stooges a WOMAN? The idiotic blonde chick?

  • Oh, Gretchen? http://blog.shankbone.org/2009/12/09/gretchen-carlson-plays-dumb-to-appeal-to-fox-news-audience/

    Gretchen is better known for her Miss America title, and comments about how she had to look up the definitions of words such as "czar" and "ignoramus", than she is for her cum laude degree from Stanford. Gretchen replaced E.D. Hill — who is better known for her "terrorist fist-jab" comment on the Obamas' dap than she is for her Harvard Law degree.

    The Right likes its women pretty and stupid, and those women who hop on the GOP bandwagon cater to stereotypes. They strive to enhance their looks, and to hide their brains at all costs — lest they be mistaken for feminists, perhaps.

  • OT: What a petty and pathetic Greenwald column. The guy was completely wrong about Obama, then just dismisses it in a sneering 'just a speech" paragraph. I can hardly wait for the 10,000 word "update" where he turns up into down, black into white, and justifies his preconceptions.

    On topic: hilarious Ed.

  • Doctor Couth says:

    @ Marc: what exactly is petty and pathetic about admitting error and seeking a more appropriate and useful frame of reference? Though he did originally, l suspect like many of us, embrace Obama as a transformation, Greenwald has been remarkably consistent about holding Obama to account for things he criticized the Bush administration for. And unfortunately when it comes to imperialism, the dismissal of civil liberties in the name of the war on terror, and the placement of Wall Street Assholes in charge of economic policy Obama has many of the same faults as Bush. Or am I being too petty in pointing that out?

  • No, I think Greenwald nailed it. Obama gave a pretty speech? So what? He doesn't do anything to live up to his words. He absolutely takes the Left for granted, and he'll move as far right as he thinks he has to for his re-election. Why should we expect anything different if he wins again?

    Between his lies about Pvt. Manning's treatment and launching a war against Libya, he's convinced me that there's no reason to vote for him again. That's after he let the torturers walk, and stepped up the Afghan campaign and drone attacks in Pakistan; in fairness to him, those were campaign promises. Of course the ones he keeps are the ones that kill the most people.

    If he can change my mind, great; that's what I'd like. I don't expect him to, much as I'd rather be wrong.

  • I agree with Greenwald (and the other commenters who agree with Greenwald). While I don't have the outrage toward Obama that I had toward GWB, I don't support him the way that I once did. He's shown that he'll compromise over everything, and won't start the compromise from the left (like a 'Democrat' is supposed to).

    He said that he won't allow the upper-income tax breaks to be renewed? I'll believe it when I see it. Maybe it'll happen at the same time he closes Gitmo.

    That said, I don't think Obama is going to change Sunil's mind, though it's likely whoever the republicans run against him will be sufficient to change my mind for a nose-pinching vote. Obama may be disappointing, but the Repubs are scary.

  • The Republicans & Fox "News" seem about as factual as professional wrestling and the old "Weekly World News" tabloid. Does their audience care?

  • Helpful advice: If you see a guy in a dirty yellow raincoat who is offering to give free breast exams in your local Walgreens, you might want to pass on that.

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