We try not to endorse products, or give away any secrets that give us an edge in life (we need all the edges we can get), but I'll let you in on the big news: Alka-Seltzer Morning Relief. Seriously.
Last night, as a result of a complicated series of events, I ended up drinking a bottle of (cheap, bad) white wine, a fair amount of Old Style, and shots of warm rail gin. This is a bad way to go about drinking. As you can imagine, I woke up with a headache. The type of headache that can only be described in Biblical terms. I still had one more day of class before break, so I hit the Morning Relief and started my day. Within 30 minutes my headache was gone, and I was a functioning member of society once again.
The way it works: it harnesses a natural, healthy way to repair the body – soluble caffeine and aspirin. Now I know what you are thinking: "Mike, I've been taking an aspirin and coffee in the morning for years to deal with hangovers." Fine and good. However, when dissolved in cold water, there is no irritation on the stomach (compared to coffee at least), and the aspirin kicks in right away. This has been optimally engineered to fight hangovers, and my god have the scientists won this battle.
The webpage is entertaining and a good read. Erik has pointed out how the box reads "Headaches / Fatigue / Hangover Symptoms"; the marketers are thinking that if you didn't get it on the first two tries, we'll just tell you this products' purpose. You won't find it at the drugstore; apparently it was the worst selling Alka-Seltzer brand ever. You can order it online, and I encourage you to do so.
If you aren't sold on it yet – three last facts. (1) "Morning relieved" has become a phrase used around my apartment. (2) When I first used it I was so surprised I wanted to Stress Test it, so Erik and I purposely got ourselves drunk in a way to induce hangovers, and we couldn't not feel great after taking the Morning Relief. (3) While packing for a trip to Mardi Gras, the first thing put in the bag was two boxes of Morning Relief. And it was triple-checked before leaving to make sure it was there.