Day: November 27, 2006

COALITION OF…AH, FUCK IT. IT'S JUST US.

Posted on | by Ed

So Britain's pro-war Labor Party has finally gotten the memo that they need to start covering their asses if they have any hope of future political success. Our anglo cousins are preparing to remove "most" of their 7,000 troop contingent in Iraq (the second-largest force behind our 140,000 troops). Ditto Italy, which currently contributes less than 100.

You forgot Poland! No, we didn't. They're leaving too (900 troops).
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The Coalition of the Willing, minus these three nations, will be the United States followed by, in descending order of troop committment:

– United States (140,000)
– South Korea (2600)
– Australia (1400)
– Netherlands (1200)
– Romania (865)
– Denmark (515)
– El Salvador (380)

Awesome! Need I even point out that the overwhelming majority of these "contingents" are non-combat personnel (engineers, medics, etc)?

So much for "Iraqization" of the ground forces.
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Let the Americanization continue unabated!
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SAVE YOUR MONEY, FOOL

Posted on | by Ed | 1 Comment on SAVE YOUR MONEY, FOOL

I have paid my six matinee dollars to see Christopher Guest's newest, For Your Consideration. In the words of Cypress Hill: save your money, fool.

People in Hollywood seem incapable of understanding the simple truth that the rest of us do not find jokes about Hollywood to be funny. This film is a perfect example of why that always fails. The reason is that there is nothing inherently likeable about Hollywood personalities. Nothing. In fact they're inherently dislikeable – most of them quite strongly.

Best in Show, Waiting for Guffman and A Mighty Wind are three of my favorite movies. They're absolutely hilarious, mostly because there's something inherently funny about dopey old folk musicians, people who go to dog shows, and small town hicks.
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Contrast that to the newest film. There is absolutely nothing funny about Hollywood agents, vapid producers, and washed-up actors.

First of all, we've never met any of those people. So if they are funny, it would basically be an inside joke for those making the film. Second, what we do know about those people suggests that they are vapid, soulless, and unspeakably vain.
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Ha ha! That's hilarious. Wait. No it isn't.

This movie is about 4% funny (basically whenever this guy was on screen) and 96% depressing. I cannot imagine what Christopher Guest was thinking. Why did he think we would be amused by actors getting dicked around by a cruel, manipulative system and then ending up suicidal and alcoholic?
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Honestly, if anyone can make it to the end of this film and tell me what's supposed to be funny about Catherine O'Hara I'd like to hear it.

The kindest I can be to this film is to say that it is a joke I didn't get. More accurately, though, I'm not sure there were any jokes at all. What a waste of a hilarious cast.