LET THE MELTDOWN BEGIN!

In the wake of the 2004 election Mike K. did a nice job highlighting the best in liberal meltdowns. I feel it's only fair to do the same for 2006.

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The granddaddy Lifetime Achievement Award Super-Mega-Burnout for 2006 absolutely has to go to Jonah Goldberg over at National Review. He has written the best non-ironic, dead-serious imitation of The Onion's "I am fucking insane" article since Ol' Dirty Bastard penned "Here Comes the Judge." You can practically picture him smearing his own shit on his chest and running around in a loincloth as you read this little gem. Yes, George W. Bush certainly could do that, Jonah. If not for the fact that he is a gigantic pussy, just like Jonah Goldberg, Sean Hannity, and every other warmongering right-wing suburban war-hawk white guy. Wouldn't W need to have his dad call in James Baker to show him how to skin the bear?

Next, let's give a collective award to Fox News for the following bit.

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This seems like prime evidence of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder.
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I prescribe a 2-week vacation and a cement mixer full of Zoloft for the entire network.

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Let's also pick on Morty Kondracke and Fred Barnes as prototypical examples of the incessant "the country is now doomed, and here is our spin on why the White House actually won the election – and if you don't buy that, here's some spin about how our Dear Leader was Shanghaied by a left-wing election-stealing machine" memes. Look at those awful partisan liberals. Refusing to confirm a good man like John Bolton? We can't figure out which motivates them – spite or treason – but it has to be one of the two!

Lastly, I am STILL SEARCHING for the video or a transcript of Shepard Smith losing his f'n mind on Fox News circa 1 AM EST on election night. If ANYONE can locate transcripts or video of his bizarre soliloquy, I'll seriously pony up something significant as a reward.
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I'm not up on the Tivo technology, but is it possible to retrieve old programming? I'm checking with the Vanderbilt TV News Archive but they don't yet have a tape of full election coverage…..

Boy Genius.

Remember that article about the Republicans mocking Democrats for living in the "reality-based community" (where they "believe that solutions emerge from your judicious study of discernible reality")? I always thought that may have been a bit unfair, since the quote was from an unnamed aide to the President.

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But then I see this interview NPR did with Karl "Fixing up my resume" Rove right before the election (transcript here):

SIEGEL: We are in the home stretch though and many would consider you on the optimistic end of realism about…
ROVE: Not that you would exhibit a bias, you just making a comment.
SIEGEL: I'm looking at all the same polls that you are looking at.
ROVE: No, you are not. I'm looking at 68 polls a week for candidates for the US House and US Senate, and Governor and you may be looking at 4-5 public polls a week that talk attitudes nationally.
SIEGEL: I don't want to have you to call races…

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ROVE: I'm looking at all of these Robert and adding them up.

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I add up to a Republican Senate and Republican House. You may end up with a different math but you are entitled to your math and I'm entitled to THE math.
SIEGEL: I don't know if we're entitled to a different math but your…

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ROVE: I said THE math.

Evidently Rove's faith-based mathematics, based on internal secret polls that I'm sure were in no way biased towards those who were paying for it, lost out to the reality-based ones.