So, this happened:
Every time I think I am not going to dignify Sarah Palin's ridiculous existence with any more attention she draws me back in. Let's try to count them.
1. Sarah Palin raked in a $100,000 fee for this speech, which sounds suspiciously like she did absolutely no advance preparation. Either she didn't bother writing a speech at all (or, let's be honest, having one written for her) or did so on the 10 minute limo ride over to TeabagCon2010. There's a small handful of people on this planet who can give a major speech before a large audience (not to mention TV cameras) without practicing. Sarah Palin isn't one of them. This sounds like she did everything except moon the crowd, give them the finger, and say "Thanks for the 100 grand, assholes!"
2. Why would she have notes unless the questions were screened and pre-approved in advance? She wouldn't, of course, which means that the questions at a Teabagger convention were too difficult for the person who wants to be the next President. The questions were variations of "Governor Palin, your campaign seems to have the momentum of a runaway freight train. Why are you so popular?" And she knew what was coming. And she needed notes to answer it.
3. She wrote "Energy. Budget Tax cuts. Lift American spirit." on her hand so she wouldn't forget her own "vision" for the future of the conservative movement she claims to lead. I can understand if someone wanted notes about the names of foreign heads of state or the GNP of Chile. But she needed notes to recite her own talking points in response to questions she knew were coming.
4. Marker-on-hand? Really? What is she, an 18 year old fratboy cheating her way through an Econ 101 midterm? I find it hard to believe that, you know, note cards or something were not viable alternatives. After 18 solid months of Obama teleprompter jokes I guess she painted herself into a corner, though.
5. Her notes at the ready, Palin treated the audience (of 1100! What a movement!) to hot, steaming nuggets of brilliance like this:
I think, kind of tougher to, um, put our arms around, but allowing America's spirit to rise again by not being afraid to kind of go back to some of our roots as a God fearing nation where we're not afraid to say, especially in times of potential trouble in the future here, where we're not afraid to say, you know, we don't have all the answers as fallible men and women so it would be wise of us to start seeking some divine intervention again in this country, so that we can be safe and secure and prosperous again.
That is exactly 100 words and it is one sentence, a sentence given in response to a question about the priorities of a hypothetical "conservative majority in Congress." In short, Congress needs to be praying for divine intervention more regularly. That'll help.
There was one instance in my five years of teaching on which I did absolutely no preparation at all for a lecture. Really, I might sound like an idiot semi-regularly but it's never for lack of preparation. Except for that one time. It was an unqualified disaster. Ad-libbing in front of 150 people for an hour is not a good idea. I walked out of class that day feeling like I should return my salary for the past hour ($6) to the State Legislature, as I could not consent to receive payment for rendering services of that quality. Despite our meager salaries, teachers and professors put a lot of time into preparing a lecture. The rule of thumb for doing the bare minimum is Prep Time = 2 x Class Time. What I'm getting at is not that we should get a cookie for doing our jobs, but that if someone paid me $100,000 to speak for 39 minutes and do some softball Q & A, I'd probably spend some time preparing. That and her extra chromosome are what separate me from Sarah Palin.
OliverWendelHolmslice says:
We need to start a new game: Sarah Palin is a cross between ________ and _______.
1) Sarah Palin is a cross between Paris Hilton, and "Corky" from Life Goes On.
2) Sarah Palin is a cross between Anita Bryant and any dim whore from Girls Gone Wild
Feel free to play along at home!
RosaLux says:
Yea, what insults and saddens me more than anything is that this talentless, incompetent fameball is ubiquitous in newspapers, news programs, and such. That Sarah Palin should occupy even the smallest fraction of public discourse is a travesty, and indicative of how our celebrity-rotten general culture has inflitrated the political world. Sarah Palin is like a reality TV contestant who, by chance stumbles into the limelight, and in spite of having zero talent, or intelligence, or experience, manages to become famous. And now we have to listen to her mediocre little platitudes on C-SPAN. Because she's famous. She's famous because she's famous. Because a bunch of Republican consultants thought (correctly) that she could be exploited and branded to create a populist persona. There should be a word for this, for the movement of politics into the realm of pure spectacle, for someone like Sarah Palin who is utterly mediocre in every substantive way but is branded into being a political icon. How about: "celebutician"? It's all part of a brave new world. John F. Kennedy looking good on a TV was one thing, but Kennedy had intellectual chops. Go back and listen to his nomination acceptance speech someday. It sounds as if Cicero himself had written it; his diction is sophisticated; he strives at real depth. How far we've fallen…Even Obama's very nice nomination speech, in comparison with the speeches of old, sounded dumbed-down for the masses, branded, written by a committee of consultants. But at least Obama actually possesses intellectual depth. Sarah Palin clearly possesses little to no intellectual depth, and most humorous to me, she obviously knows it. I love it how in any interview where she has to speak spontaneously or (gasp) answer a question, she get flustered. Her forehead wrinkles, she blushes, she begins to speak quickly, and far too low, and she stutters. She takes refuge in vague platitudes about "love of country" or "cutting taxes" and begins to spew them out at random, desperately trying to conceal what she knows to be her fantastic ignorance on nearly all of the pertinent issues of our day.
Sator Arepo says:
That is not acceptable. It is not acceptable to suggest, even remotely seriously and conscientiously, that Praying is a fucking solution for fixing the country's problems and returning to prominence, or whatever bullshit thinly -disguised neo-imperialist Doctrine of American Exceptionalism tripe they're selling.
It is not acceptable to proclaim that God Talks To Me and be expected to be taken seriously in the public sphere. People can believe whatever they want, but it makes historically and demonstrably poor public policy to Turn It All Over To Him to solve, say, a financial or political problem.
Really?
"…it would be wise of us to start seeking some divine intervention again in this country, so that we can be safe and secure and prosperous again."
Divine intervention? Are you fucking shitting me?
I am beyond words and possibly consolation right now. Gaah.
jon says:
There is a spark of intelligence on display in the word that is crossed out. If she had actually discussed the budget, she might have had to use math. So it was a good thing she had the foresight to redact that portion of the hand. She's no retard: she's a sharpie. Her policies still have cognitive developmental difficulties, but I admire her penmanship. If I had done that, people would be arguing about what I wrote with analysis that would put the MacGruder film to shame.
As for the God nonsense: I'll trust in God when I can see the birth certificate.
jon says:
Just reread the God paragraph, and am damn insulted. Americans couldn't work their asses off to make this country? It was just handed to us on a platter from God? Fuck you, Sarah and all your ilk. This country was the result of toil and luck and pluck and hard work, not divine fucking decree. This country's greatness comes from people who saw problems and sought solutions, not a bunch of fucks in tricorner hats waving flags and shouting down anyone who tried to make things better. This country is about Benjamin Franklin, who knew how to budget for the future and work for the next generation, not King George III who only wanted more of the same. This country hasn't been preserved by God, it was made in spite of him. Fearing God doesn't make us great, it makes us great that we can fear him or worship him in the wrong way or even deny his existence and still build a future.
As for safety, security, and prosperity, that comes from work. Sarah's heard of the concept, but doesn't understand it outside of the realm of blue collar stuff. There isn't anyone of any political stripe who denies the value of work (no matter how much they might place it at different pay scales.) But it seems that she doesn't understand management, which is what she is applying to be part of. For her, government work is just a matter of having the right philosophy but nothing about having any ability to deal with people, different agendas, priorities, compromises, and all the other things it takes to run a government. She's easily flustered, which is why she must be carefully controlled (and why she allows herself to be.) For her it's win or quit, which is why she has yet to fail at the levels she aspires to inflict upon us all. She talks a good game about hard work, but when it comes down to it she can't handle it in her chosen arena. It doesn't matter if you have the right or wrong ideas, but having no ability to organize or win over people is not a skill most voters should embrace in their leaders. Of course, she represents millions of Americans who think that government is a parlor game where all the world's problems can be solved if only those politicians would listen to The Common Folk. I don't know or care if she actually believes that or if she's just an opportunist, but such thinking must be quashed. It takes work to run America, not slogans. But to the Palinites, she represents the Cargo Cult Capitalism where credit cards rain from the sky so it doesn't matter what a gallon of gas costs. They not only want that viewpoint expressed, but they need it.
Zeb says:
Do you think she needs a ghostwriter to scribble on her hand, too?
dbsmall says:
What upsets me is that, despite ample evidence like that above, there are large groups of the electorate that believe she's qualified to be VP or President, who lined up to buy her book or hear her speech. And not all of those folks are dumb.
Remaining entrenched in your views, despite the evidence, isn't a sign of stupidity. It's a sign of bias or prejudice. And what scares me is how many biased people there seem to be, ready to vote in this country.
Seth 4:10 says:
I
jon says:
Part of the reason this country has a divided government (which certainly wasn't God's idea) is that those people who designed it saw what divine guidance in the mind of an idiot did to places and people and things. We have rules in place designed to keep idiots from ruining everything, but that isn't enough to keep idiots from getting elected in the first place.
A few dim bulbs in the House aren't going to undermine our place in the world, a few in the Senate can make a bigger stink, even if a dimwit rises to the top in the courts it will only be one of nine (or five, unfortunately,) but the stupid really should be kept out of the Presidency because that's where too many decisions get made. And this woman has shown herself to be unprepared to answer basic questions about her decision making, which isn't because of the arrogance of those who question her (which is her assertion) but because she doesn't have a decision-making process that involves any logic at all.
Kulkuri says:
She does know how to work a crowd, if the crowd is made up of her supporters.
She is willfully ignorant in that if the facts don't agree with the talking points given to her, she ignores the facts.
The truly scary part is that there are people willing to pay to see and hear her.
John says:
As dbsmall was quick to point out: it is important to remember that there exist people in this country — and not necessarily a tiny group of them — that believe this woman should be our president. They believe this bimbo from Alaska that couldn't even sweat out one term as governor of a backwater state and who needs to write tired, old talking points on her hand should hold the most powerful office in the land.
The extreme wing of the GOP has successfully convinced a nation of morons that they should elect the most moronic among them to be their leader.
Da Moose says:
Anybody, who, in the same sentence, can argue for a non-carbon based economy while pushing for new offshore/onshore drilling projects definitely deserves to lead this country into the 21st century…You betcha!
The Mad Dreamer says:
dbsmall – "And not all of those folks are dumb."
I wouldn't be so sure. I'd venture to guess that we're reaching the point where we can add a new definition to the word dumb.
jon says:
To call her stupid would be an insult to stupid people.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E5IQnQhzMSI
Pan Sapiens says:
I'm not ashamed to admit that, after seeing that ink-stained little paw of hers, I'd love to cross the species barrier and just literally fuck all the freshness right out of her on national TV. I mean, just completely smudge out that dirty ittle scrawl with some simian splooge. Yes. I know it's wrong. Yes, I know it's sick. But… Lawgiver, help me, the lack of fur, the glasses, it's a huge turn-on.
Oh, and dbsmall. I'll be in California towards the end of the month. I've a full schedule of nad-kicking ahead of me, but I'm sure I can pencil you in.
moonbat says:
We're extremely fortunate that skilled manipulators like Palin and GW Bush lack brains, and often make fools of themselves. Otherwise they would truly be running the world, for the benefit of themselves and their friends.
I mean, if someone loves you so much that they're willing to pay you $100,000 to just show up, it's not for their pearls of wisdom. It's just to be in their aura. Thinking thru what you're going to say, on the ten minute ride in the airport limo is about the appopriate level of preparation the situation calls for. That's the difference between SP and teaching, where the students are primarily there for what knowledge you can impart, and are rarely there just to share in your glow.
Now if SP had the brains to go with her other gifts, she could be a world class megalomaniac, leveraging each appearance such as this to the max, preparing to the hilt. She's not there yet, and probably never will be. Thank God for that. For now, it's enough for her to bask in the adulation, spout some word salad, and collect her check.
OneMadClown says:
All one needs to know about Sarah Palin's intellectual chops can be gleaned from this simple fact: George W. Bush — Bible-humping, openly contemptuous of intelligence, dry-drunk, pre-verbal frat boy George W. Bush — thought she was a little light in the brainpan. When the Cretin-in-Chief is snickering at you, you've got a problem. Don'tchaknow.
Entomologista says:
Actually, it's Palin's baby that has the extra chromosome. You just have a different chromosome.
/nitpick
Pan Sapiens says:
Actually, Entomologista, I think Ed was calling her a retard whilst avoiding the "r" word. In the future, if you wish to pick nits (harvest louse eggs), leave the grooming to us pros. We actually find the little fuckers tasty.
JohnR says:
You know, a lot of those "stupid" people aren't actually stupid, but rather just will not see anything they don't wish to. They're the same people who could look at the completely, obviously lazy and foolish little man who was George Bush on the campaign trail, and see someone wise and thoughtful. They're doing the same for the silly, dangerous Palin woman. Since there's no real effort by the press to really cover her critically (not that it would make much difference at this point anyway), her chances of getting elected are probably comparable to Mitt Romney at this point. Unless the Democratic Party actually decides to govern for a change, that's probably about the same chance as Obama at this point, and it's swinging toward the GOP. I find fewer and fewer people outside of these blog circle-discussions who continue to feel positive about the Democrats and their efforts. Unrelenting sincle-source PR is effective, even if it's obviously made up of lies.
Crazy for Urban Planning says:
I watched the online version of C-Span's Sunday "Washington Journal" this morning. Sadly, it was primarily about SP. What strikes me the most about her numerous supporters is not that they are all old and white, nor that they can abide listening to these stale idiot talking points, but just that they are closed minded and dumb. What kind of bizarre universe do they really exist in? They refuse to acknowledge the multiple services the government has granted them over the years? Do they ever enjoy city, state, or federal parks? Do they ever drive on roads? Do they think these services grow on trees? Is it nothing but Ronald Raygun dogma that the government doesn't do anything? I just don't understand them… but I'm not the brightest guy on this message board…
Crazy for Urban Planning says:
"Unless the Democratic Party actually decides to govern for a change…"!! Eureka! That is just it – lets go further in depth. Since the Clinton era Democrats have been more reliant on big business, banks, and "hollywood" for campaign contributions than the traditional trade and work unions. This means these "regular joe 6 packs" that have migrated to SP were formerly of the Democratic party – however, today it appears the Democrats do not represent them any longer. I think its all because people have simply lost faith in dems…
EdBradly7 says:
What I am puzzled by is the fact that the Wasilla Soprano"s is a lefty. How does a lefty write on her left hand? Also to, she writes six or seven words on her hand and crosses one of the words out. Truly Presidential Timber.
jazzbumpa says:
I'm making yet another attempt to slog my way through Russell Kirk's 1952 classic THE CONSERVATIVE MIND, never having been able to force myself past Pg 35. I recommend it highly, with the caveat that it is not for the faint-hearted. In the first few pages you'll learn that ignorance and prejudice are pillars of what passes for the conservative thought process.
And yes, they really do believe that nations live out the role granted them by providence. Palin's statement about divine intervention is not mere wight wing wackery. It is central to the conservative view of the world, which is deeply steeped in magical thinking.
You have no idea how much I wish I were making this up
Remember when GWB said he knew god wanted him to be president? That scared the shit out of me.
We are SO fucked!
Desargues says:
I looked hard at her smudged hand, and wondered why she left out "Also" and the winkie emoticon. Lazy to the bone this GILF, I tells ya.
Ed says:
I'd say at least one of you should be kept 100 feet away from anything female at all times.
displaced Capitalist says:
Crazy For Urban Planning:
It's the same people who don't look at the moon and wonder what it is. Their failure to understand the government is systemic and comes from a lack of desire to understand anything. Why do your thinking when someone else can think for you?
waldo says:
Sarah the patsy Judas goat's rise and rise was predicted and beautifully illustrated 20 years ago.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ecXT1fMuEZw
Sarah's not a retard. She's wilfully ignorant, a trait embraced by a large section of the American political psyche during the torture, rape and butchery of Vietnam Laos and Cambodia, and encouraged and fostered by the religio/ultra-right/neocon cabal ever since.
dbsmall says:
Ed, don't worry. My strategic plan for testicular sacrifice should keep women (and animals) safe from both of us.
Althouh I now question both his taste and his badassedness.
Sator Arepo says:
It seems to me that if there had been camera phones in the 60s, W would never have been president. But perhaps I underestimate.
beau says:
misunderestimate.
Sator Arepo says:
Well, I walked right in to that one. Well played, sir.
Julie says:
There have been so many times in recent years where I think something could just not possibly happen and then it happens. Like Bush getting elected a second time, or prop 8 passing in California. I can only take so much and if Palin becomes president I'm moving to Peru and telling them all I'm Canadian.
Neal Deesit says:
"There should be a word for this, for the movement of politics into the realm of pure spectacle, for someone like Sarah Palin who is utterly mediocre in every substantive way but is branded into being a political icon."
There's a collection of words for this: Neil Postman's "Amusing Ourselves to Death," described in Wikipedia:
"The essential premise of the book, which Postman extends to the rest of his argument(s), is that "form excludes the content," that is, a particular medium can only sustain a particular level of ideas. Thus Rational argument, integral to print typography, is militated against by the medium of television for the aforesaid reason. Owing to this shortcoming, politics and religion are diluted, and "news of the day" becomes a packaged commodity. Television de-emphasises the quality of information in favour of satisfying the far-reaching needs of entertainment, by which information is encumbered and to which it is subordinate."
Sarah Palin doesn't need ideas; she's "telegenic."
Jessica Taylor says:
camera phones are very convenient coz they can take picture and calls at the same time".,
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