SO IT'S SETTLED

We'll just have one mass shooting per week in exchange for the continued failure to address any of the problems related to gun control and violence in our society.

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Furthermore, they will continue in the current rotating order of courthouse (Federal offices of any kind are acceptable), church, and school (hospitals may be substituted in a pinch).

If the mass shootings violate their portion of the agreement by increasing in number to two or three per week, we'll consider reconsidering.

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